Thursday, March 04, 2010

Summertime and the living is easy...

I just found this picture in my Flickr stream....and I could almost smell the summery air. The Vaseline blur of hindsight has me longing for simpler times.

Yesterday was hard.

Little Blondie said to me at lunch "Momma what does dead mean?" followed by "Do we come back to life after we die?". What do you make of the weight of that for lunchtime conversation? My answers were maybe too blunt, but I don't think that this conversation is easy to have at 3 years old or 35 years old. My concrete thinker was overwhelmed and inconsolable.

I wasn't really prepared for the depth of his emotion because he is my "stoic" child. Imaginative, but very composed and in the here and now of life. Brownie is a very methodical, logical thinker and I believe that our "death" discussion lasted 2-3 minutes and then we were off to "Why is the sky blue?" But Blondie, faced with his own mortality, just wept. I could only hold him and love him. It was a huge leap of development for him, I felt like one of my chicks ran from the cover of my protective wings and there is no way to get him to come back. He is growing up...AGAIN! I am not ready. It was too big a day for this momma hen.
JMB

6 comments:

Diane said...

Your photo reminded me of the J M Barrie quotation, “God gave us memory so that we might have roses in December.”

woolywoman said...

oh, hard day for mom. so sorry!

Diane said...

I meant to get right back to you after ponderiing the death question. My boys were the same age as yours when we lost several close family members within a short time. After feeling confident that I had explained dealth in an appropriate manner for their little selves to understand, my younger son asked if Uncle Wayne got to heaven "in a car or in a truck." It takes a lifetime to understand these things, and I'm sorry to say, your heart will break a little more each time they come up. Thank God the loss of innocence is gradual! I remember sobbing over first swear words, their realization that sex exists, as well as more spiritual matters. It's tough being a mom but you are not alone.

花花蝴蝶 said...

喜歡你的部落格,讓人流連忘返 ........................................

AMIT said...

You like summertime?I actually do not like.

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Yaz and Rob said...

Hmmmm. I know both kids have brought up death and I am so matter of fact when I say well it is part of life and all things die, even people and we will all die. They both seem like it is nothing. I think it has not really registered yet, maybe.