The Journey...

I have been thinking a lot lately about the journey that we take to get from one point to another.  It is not linear, and I had thought myself a linear-type of person.  It is not about the destination or the product, and I had always thought that I was a destination type of gal too.  What I am seeing about motherhood, daughterhood, sisterhood, personhood is that there is so much to be learned at each step... if I will just let myself slow down and figure it out.  There is so much to be seen, and taken in if I will just remember that "it is supposed to be fun." There is also fellowship and enough room for all of us, if only I remember that our journeys take different paths at times.

I am still working on the things that need to be culled and purged from this path I am on now.  I am feeling the sweetness of carrying around less (20+lbs thanks goodness), but also that illuminates other things that were formerly precious and that I can be rid of.  I feel keenly that I need to get on with being myself, but that there is a process to it that can't be rushed.

There is anticipation, dreaminess,  and nervous optimism for the future.

I am busy Dreaming Bigger.
Nice to see you here.

JMB

Brlu... a blur

Hey, there I am... Let me see if I am getting this saying right, 'the years fly by while the minutes drag on and on.' Is that right? In the moment I am having such a time trying to stay on track, but when I look back on the last week and a half (and then the year before...) (Thank Goodness for instagram)....OH, that's what I have been up to. Thinking has been sort of a problem area for me these days, so I have just been doing things and then seeing how I feel after they are already done... This sounds silly written out, but just doing has created some sort of forward motion for me and this is a GOOD THING.
*This doll quilt (started in 2008, strike that 2010!!! Hooray! Sister quilt here) is halfway quilted- Finally found the right grey thread... a good thing (gt!)
*Hoop-up inspiration piece finished!! Thanks Badbird for the gratis' pattern! and thanks Marilyn for the heart idea, I just love it! (gt!)
*Shelter project DONE! (It was his project, but it brought back so many memories of procrastinating... I mean nightmares.) (gt!)
*Lot's of little Mango this week... she is always talking about "When I be a Woman..." Oh Jeez, can we just put a pin in that for a while little lady?!*Handwork bag for school raffle basket-- I used my scissors fabric (I need to use my favorite fabrics more--I am starting to amass so many that I am running out of room!)(gt!)
*Ode to Keats block- for the Pastiche Bee--inspired by these lines. (a very fun group, challenging, a bit intimidating, but SO fun)(gt!)

"...A feather on the sea,

Sway'd to and fro by every wind and tide?

Of as uncertain speed

As blow-ball from the mead?"

From "an Ode to Fanny"

*Walking in the freezing flooded areas near home. I like this picture, because you can't hear them grousing about being made to walk! (gt!)
*Finished Noro Garden fingerless mitts-- WITH a thumb! A new trick I learned, couldn't be easier, but was a little scary at first. I was proud of myself, because after I finished these and wore them for a few days, I found them to be too long. Instead of just throwing them in the closet, I tore out an inch in each hand and also reknit the thumb... SO LIBERATING!! (gt!)
*Finished a Good Luck Cowl from some handspun from the Black Sheep Gathering (just this past June!) I probably need to block it again to get the bottom scallops to turn out, but I have been cold and I am wearing it a lot. (this was actually finished right after Christmas-- but... c'est la vie)(gt!)

Good thing tally: at least 8-- good enough for me!

One last excursion from the past 2 weeks is here... what a fun time.

One last thing, just to keep me honest with myself and maybe someone out there has a helpful word. In these past few months, I signed up to see a counselor to deal with the loss of my mom. I went to 3 sessions and she just wasn't very helpful. Last week I went to a grief group through Hospice-- and WOW, what a lot of pain that was-- I kind of got freaked out after I got there and realized that everyone there was as sad as me (more or less) and that is a lot for one room. I told myself that I would maybe try another session, but then I am also thinking that maybe I am just not ready, or maybe it is not for me.

I just don't know.

For now I am just picking up my knitting, my sewing, my camera and doing something. I am hoping that some of the other will take care of itself, if I stay open to it. Is that too much to hope for?

hmmm

JMB

-If you have any ideas and the comments are too public, send me an email-- what ever works, works, right?!

There more but... isn't that always how it is?!

Greetings--

This week has passed in a blur. It is the last week of school for us before the BIG VACAY!! Big Daddy has been traveling an ridiculous amount---- and

--- Yup, that was me taking a sigh break. I can't believe it, but yesterday in the hallway AT school, I said to a few other moms that I didn't really care for the new therapist I have been seeing. BUT, I think that I am going to keep seeing her, BECAUSE it forces me to find help for my kids and be "not mom" for ONE WHOLE HOUR A WEEK! We all laughed. They did, because it was AWKWARD (and a bit identifiable) and me because, once again the old MOUTH was moving light years faster than my SOCIAL filters. The rest of the afternoon was just a free-for-all because Big Daddy was FINALLY coming home and I was pondering what I had realized...

Having my youngest turning 2 has been kind of an underground weirdness... at this point with the boys I was already planning my next pregnancy. There aren't going to be any more, so the paradigm shifts and I am floating out here in uncharted waters. I am seeing that there is going to be a day (sooner than I think) that I am going to be "not mom" for hours at a time. What is that going to mean for me? Do I really think that I am going to fill that time cleaning and doing housework?!! What is the next phase? I think THAT is the fetus I am gestating now... (I just wanted to write fetus)

Frida--- I have been thinking a lot about Frida these days. The colors she used, the dark and light aspects of her art, the intimacy of her self portraits-- I just want to know more. Is there anything that you just want to know more of? Curiosity is a comfort.

So-- I bet you all have been sleeping restlessly, tossing and turning, wondering WHO won the STITCH Gifts 2011 magazine. The random number generator picked #4 and that was a lovely lady named Hilda. We have been in touch and it is winging its way to her house. I was so surprised to see all the new people who commented. It was like THIS year there are an entire DIFFERENT 9 people reading this blog. You poor people, it has been a rather rough year. I am really sooooo much different when the whole Cancer-thing is not a part of everyday life. It has been nice to have a place to put some of those feelings, a safe place, with nice people. Isn't that all any of us want?

I may be back this week with something lighter... I did find a AWESOME silver tinsel tree for $3 and it has been cheering me up as the Willamette Valley has moved in to the damp freeze zone.

CHeerio!

JMB

All there is, is Love...

Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.

There's nothing you can do that can't be done. 

Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.

Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game It's easy. 

There's nothing you can make that can't be made. 

No one you can save that can't be saved. 

Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you in time - It's easy.  

All you need is love, all you need is love, All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.

All you need is love, all you need is love, All you need is love, love, love is all you need. 

There's nothing you can know that isn't known. 

Nothing you can see that isn't shown. 

Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be. It's easy. 

All you need is love, all you need is love, All you need is love, love, love is all you need. 

All you need is love (all together now) 

All you need is love (everybody) 

All you need is love, love, love is all you need. 

--Lennon/McCartney

Amira Sue-Lin Simons

Truth teller, Giver of Love, Creator, Free Spirit

Mommy, Mother, Grandmanu

Her passing leaves a vacuum in my life.

I love her, she is free.

June 4, 1951- October 12, 2011

Fullness of life :)

1. {this moment}, 2. Jellies, 3. "Naps are Pretty Amazing", 4. www.flickr.com/photos/annamariahorner/6035218021/in/faves..., 5. Amos Lee at the Cuthbert under a full moon, 6. Gratitude, 7. clean., 8. "Blanc lumière" en Arles, 9. Growing uP, 10. Spools, 11. DQS 11 Progress, 12. August 14, 2011, 13. Pillow WIP done!!!, 14. Suburb, 15. the bees, 16. water lilies, 17. Beach huts, 18. Molly's Sketchbook: Felt Flower Charms, 19. + and x blocks, 20. BeeFF quilt in progress , 21. Ringo Pie Sunlight for Marit, 22. coordinating, 23. bee imaginative top, 24. 175/365, 25. Plans for RIngo Pie

My mom had surgery for a really yucky infection in her original tumor site this morning. She made it through and I just wanted to post some pretty pictures. I love that people are so generous with their lives on Flickr. They post pretty things that either spark me creatively, emotionally, or just give my eyes a little joyride.

I love making mosaics... and then sitting and looking at them when I need a little pick me up. I appreciate all of your thoughts and comments the past months, and acknowledge that my responses have been spotty at best. Every one of them I have read and taken some comfort from. Between Cancer, infections, planning trips to Hawaii, and those three gorgeous and ACTIVE kids of mine--- time is FULL. Life is very full. I was looking across the room the other day at Big Daddy and just thinking that I am glad that when there is an ebb in the fullness of life right now, we will still have each other. We still will have laughter, a messy house, and love. Maybe I don't like the messy house, but it comes with the other two SO I WILL TAKE IT!

I just want to get to September and take my mom to Hawaii. I really do.

I am thankful right now for a resilient spirit. At this moment I know that I will not be given more than I can handle, but that it takes me a moment to find my legs to stand. I know that I am able to laugh and cry-- sometimes simultaneously... and then go and fold some laundry so that we can all have clean clothes.

JMB

A space for me...

1. playing in my little studio..., 2. summer afternoon., 3. Ship / Boat / Color, 4. Paint the Room, What Color?, 5. Summer garden, 6. Color , 7. Colors, 8. Summer Sommer Wild Flower Blume Wildblume Nature Natur Germany Bavaria Bayern, 9. Summer 2009, 10. Summer Sommer Wild Flower Blume Wildblume Nature Natur Germany Bavaria Bayern, 11. Summer, 12. Summer Sunshine, 13. summer, 14. Summer Wind, 15. Summer, 16. summer, 17. What are your favorite colors?, 18. Summer Tanager, 19. Summer!, 20. 141, 21. Los Angeles / Ferris Wheel / Summer, 22. Flowers / Summer / Nature / Bee, 23. Half Done!, 24. Study of Bird in Berry Bush, 25. allium

I just realized that it has been 5 years since I first cracked open the door to the blogosphere... since I made a little space for myself midst the wilds of life at home with children. I love it here and there with them.

Today is the last day of school for Brownie.

Blondie is having some growing pains (mostly I need to figure out a new way of communicating with me/him that is less yell/cry, and more hug/smile.)

Little, "Sweet", Mango is also challenging me with her ability to quietly climb--meddle-- and take off clothes.

Fullness, I have said it before, I will say it again... but right now I need to look at my little happy place and breathe deep.

JMB

Being a mama...

Just when you think the sinus pressure and the days are going to GET you... they put on their helmets and ride an old skateboard together.

Little joys.

Three of them.

Melt me.

JMB

Summertime and the living is easy...

I just found this picture in my Flickr stream....and I could almost smell the summery air. The Vaseline blur of hindsight has me longing for simpler times.

Yesterday was hard.

Little Blondie said to me at lunch "Momma what does dead mean?" followed by "Do we come back to life after we die?". What do you make of the weight of that for lunchtime conversation? My answers were maybe too blunt, but I don't think that this conversation is easy to have at 3 years old or 35 years old. My concrete thinker was overwhelmed and inconsolable.

I wasn't really prepared for the depth of his emotion because he is my "stoic" child. Imaginative, but very composed and in the here and now of life. Brownie is a very methodical, logical thinker and I believe that our "death" discussion lasted 2-3 minutes and then we were off to "Why is the sky blue?" But Blondie, faced with his own mortality, just wept. I could only hold him and love him. It was a huge leap of development for him, I felt like one of my chicks ran from the cover of my protective wings and there is no way to get him to come back. He is growing up...AGAIN! I am not ready. It was too big a day for this momma hen.

JMB

Sometimes, when I 'm lucky...

See there, tucked in so sweetly... a wee Mango, going for a ride at the sewing machine.
Before, I show my most recent acquisitions, all mommies should at least glance at this site. I found it enlightening and so very real.
There was a sale on decorator weight fabrics... $5/yd!! I am such a glutton.
I finally bought a yard of these...I had been looking, but then the local store got them in and wow they do look THAT good in real life.
Must buy pinks!!
Still can't escape the aquas!!
And to top it off some beautiful new solids. The orange I had to buy because it is called "Mango". The two drab ones are actually lovely colors of grey, a light one and a charcoal. I am excited to start something new... but then again I always LOVE the starting!!

I saw this post, I just love the colors that Lily used!! I have never tried this pattern because I thought it was "too easy"???? I have to say that, today, I am so wooed by the simplicity of it.

I have been working on a large quilt (on and off for about 3 months) it is for my little Blondie. He was so excited when I let him hang a swap quilt on his wall that I knew it was time for him to have his own bed size quilt. I finished another big chunk of the front piecing. I will share it when I have some of the bigger pieces put together. I am very happy with how it is turning out.

Well, in the famous last words of a new mother, I am off to feed the baby. Thanks for being so sweet to little Mango last week, she had such a lovely time blogging.

JMB

these are the days...

these are days you'll remember

never before and never since, I promise
will the whole world be warm as this
and as you feel it, you'll know it's true
that you are blessed and lucky
it's true, that you are touched by something
that will grow and bloom in you

these are days you'll remember

when May is rushing over you with desire
to be part of the miracles you see in every hour
you'll know it's true, that you are blessed and lucky
it's true, that you are touched by something
that will grow and bloom in you

these are the days

that you might fill with laughter
until you break

these days you might feel a shaft of light
make its way across your face
and when you do
you'll know how it was meant to be
see the signs and know their meaning

you'll know how it was meant to be
hear the signs and
know they're speaking to you
to you

-10,000 maniacs "These are the Days"

Last night, we walked down our block to an open field. I sat in the grass with little Mango as the boys and Big Daddy played Frisbee. I don't think that we have ever played Frisbee down there before. Yet, it seemed as if we had always done what we were doing right then, with our family just as it is right now. There was a lightning storm that we watched move across the sky. Then a small bat darted over our heads in the breeze. It was a perfect moment. We were together, so healthy, and blessed to be out on a beautiful night.

While the boys played and ran through the field, this song played in my head. I am horrible at remembering lyrics, but this song always felt a certain way to me. Looking at the lyrics tonight, they really capture the way I feel about this moment and this time in our lives, right now.

I feel so blessed.

JMB

When it rains, it pours...

Welcome to the world baby girl!!!

We are home and happy! The rains started here right after she was born, it feels like a new beginning all around!

Mango came to be with us @ 12:56 a.m. Saturday morning (the 5th) She is 8# 7oz and 19.5 in long. We are all doing well, a bit sore, but that will fade. The brothers are coming home from Grandma's today. Let the party begin!!

Thanks for all of your kind wishes, they helped me through...we will be around!

JMB

Just about this time last year...

(Brownie, first day of school circa 2008)

Here I sit, 2009, in the hospital room. No baby yet but some contractions... we will see. Last year at this time I was sending my first born off to Kindergarten. How the times have changed.

I just wanted to get a note out to the "outside", the "web locks" here won't let me do facebook. Maybe it is too salacious??

I can't wait to hold that little girl in my arms.

JMB

Late breaking news...

I am officially 3 weeks away from my due date AND on a modified bed rest restriction due to high blood pressure. I am OK with slugging around a bit until the "blessed event", but any thing out of the norm is a bit anxiety raising for me. Yesterday at the office when we discovered that I was running a bit "hot" there was all this talk about induction and "delivering" me. It kind of freaked me out. I am still hoping for a natural birth, with as little intervention as possible. I go in tomorrow for another BP check and an ultrasound. I guess I will know more then. If you are so inclined keep me in your thoughts for a gentle and healthy birth. I would like that very much.

I am a little bit disappointed because our county fair is this week and I can't go (maybe???). I was more pro-active than usual this year (I don't know how, maybe it was the kids being in summer camp??) and I entered 3 quilts and 3 photographs. Big Daddy took the boys this evening and reported back that of the 4 items he could find (dragging the boys through the exhibits was a bowl of fun, I am betting) all 4 had ribbons!!!! The quilts won 2 seconds and a third place finish and the picture, they could find won, a second place. I am so excited!!! I have never placed in the fair before (I have entered various things maybe 2 or 3 other times.) I really want to go and see them...I will be asking the midwife tomorrow, if that could possibly be allowed. Wouldn't that be sweet? (I think that the one above was 3rd place for quilting in a wall hanging.)(the other two are here and here.)

JMB

One, 2, THREE...

And they are all grown up...

We lost two teeth this week. My first baby lost two little teeth. He looks so much older to me now. I can see the new, grown up, ones peeking through his pink gums. When I want to take a picture he now gives me the full "razz-a-ma-tazz" sequence, but he still smiles. I love that, but part of me misses those baby teeth.

JMB

Being a mom...

Today was my mom's birthday.  We ate chocolate cake, her favorite kind.  After this evening, I think that it just may be my Blondie's fav too.

I had this rather silly epiphany today, one that I think that only a momma could possibly have.  Picture this, I am 6 months pregnant trying to help my child (who is doing a FABULOUS job being potty trained) wipe...and I get pooped on.  It was humid in Oregon today, I am pregnant and stooped over and now, I am pooped on??  Yuck!  Please! (sorry for the graphic nature of this post, but this is me, real time!)  

Before I had kids, if you would have asked me about a low point in my week, I think that it might have included being pooped on.  I have a very sensitive nose and an intense gag reflex, I had always thought that poop and vomit would be my downfall as a mom.  BUT, and here is the saving grace of this post, the poop didn't even phase me.  It won't even place in my top 10 of low points this week.  It is not that my week is so bad that it won't register, it is just that my low points are reserved for when I am short with my kids or my husband, when I am tired and I can't listen to one more knock-knock joke (yes, they are both getting in on THAT action now), not the poop.

Today, I just cleaned it up and tried to comfort my kid because he felt really embarrassed about it and my heart hurt for him.  Later, I thought about it...  I thought "Wow, I am a Mom."  It isn't the stinky stuff that really matters, and I had thought THAT was going to be the hard part of mothering.  It is just not and wow, the stuff that is the hard part is so much deeper.  It is about who you really are as a person, who you want to be.  I am just hoping that I can keep doing right by this family because I am the Mom.

To mommas everywhere, keep being great people, don't worry about a little poop!

JMB

Make it work!

I am finally getting the third disk of Project Runway Season 4 (?) (I think...) and I am SOOOO excited.  I already know who wins (the trials of netflix vs. TV) but I love seeing the outfits and how the designers strive to "Make it work!"  For those of you who do NOT watch the show (You should) but that is what Tim Gunn always sez to the hopeful designers, even when it looks as though their outfit is NOT going to work. (No, not for a million years.)

I thought of this yesterday as I made Pants Pattern Trial III.  I was bending over the too low kitchen table and my blasted sheet (the "muslin" if you will...) kept falling off the table.  I finally turned to my good friend "Canada Dry" for a third hand.  It worked nicely.  I wish I could say that Trial III was a slam dunk, but alas, it was not....

Wait, 

No, really wait

On the way to class, I had the most obvious epiphany (does that even make sense?) what am I doing trying to get a "fit" to a pair of pants during my second trimester???   HELLO?!!!!  OK, alert the obvious police...  not only is my waistline growing exponentially, but the hips and the hind quarters are not too far behind.  Ahhhh, the joys of pregnancy and motherhood.  I have been honing this pattern for 4 weeks now....I am sure that I have gained at least 7 pounds and 100 inches in that time.  When I shared my revelation with my classmates, sure they all chuckled, "You are so funny, Jessica."...but I really didn't feel like anyone understood the futility of well-fitted pants to a pregnant woman.... it is just not going to happen.  I am content with using my most current re-draft and some STRETCHY fabric and calling it a day.  That is what I am going to do and we are just going to be fine with that.  My dream is that some day I will actually make an article of clothing that will look and fit me well enough that I can show you all.

A girl can have a dream.

JMB

Edited to include:

I think I fixed my picture issue thanks to some rockin' blogger helpers in the layout and template forum.  I am so happy, so happy. (because it worked!)

JMB

Resting, working, thinking...a lot...

Hi,

I have missed you.  I have missed me.  I have been thinking a lot.  Big picture ideas, little picture notions.  What is going on, what will be, what I have control over, what I don't.  Then....what to make of that.

My friend Beth made it out of surgery well, but not as expected.  They opened her up to take out the large tumor and found several small tumors in the connective tissue.  It did not go according to the original plan, a new one has to be made...  What will be now?  This is the scary part to me, the unknown, the uncontrollable.  I felt really numb and sad for a while.  I still feel sad.   BUT, she is still here with us.  This is cause for joy, despite the unknown.  

We all are here just for as long as we are.  There are no contracts on that.  We have the time that we have and during that time we need to LIVE.  We need to appreciate each other and the work of our bodies, to do what we can to leave the earth better because of our lives LIVED here.

In a round about way all of this thinking and dealing has really made my word this year fit.  My word is Welcome.  For me it is about me being inviting in my heart to all the things I am going to learn this year, all the things that I am going to experience this year, all of the change that inevitably will happen.  I did not know when I picked my word that it was going to effect me so profoundly, but it is really helping me to see the journey that I am on.  I don't know if I really have ever thought that a life as a journey, as silly as that may seem.  For some reason I have always thought that it was more a series of discrete chapters.  I have always thought of things ending and beginning.  It does not seem so black and white to me now.  I am seeing that there is a flow to things, one event running in to another, and flowing back to a happening in the past that suddenly makes sense. Going on and on...  the lives of your children carrying you further and then back to your own parents.

Yes, it has been a week of much thinking.

The thing that strikes me as totally absurd and also totally obvious, is that while I have been having these Jack Handey-esque "Deep Thoughts", my boys have been marching on in their own growth.  In the past week my youngest has decided to be potty trained and my oldest is venturing ever forward in his pursuit of language and reading.  I think that all moms must go through this from time to time....as you, yourself seem to be growing and expanding, the little ones around you are showing you how it is done with far more grace and acceptance than you can muster yourself.  Wow.... and wow.

I have a bunch of exciting quilting, sewing ideas (you are going to sew your own clothes you say?), and I want to share about a sabbatical I am going to be taking this summer... but I think that has to brew for a few more days.

Thank you all so much for your kind words and heart felt prayers, I feel blessed by them and Beth will too.

JMB

Woo-hoo!

This is the fun that we have been having around here lately! Speaking of fun, I wanted to thank everyone for their votes for the Gnome home...WE won!! I was so excited to read this today. And I am even more excited to pick out my print.

I haven't blogged about them for awhile....but my two boys are growing like weeds. I feel like every time the laundry cycles through I am seeing more and more "highwaters" in their pants' drawers. AND is there a mystical link between the age 2.5 and 5.5?? Or is it a "brotherhood"?? I have been feeling lately that the two of them have been plotting before they fall asleep to overthrow my queendom. They have been hitting me from all sides lately. If it isn't the never ending
"Knock, knock."
"Whose there?"
"Banana."
"Banana Who?"

"Knock, knock."
"Whose there?"
"Banana."
AHHHHHHHHHH
Then it is the "Mom, you skipped that part of the Reindeer song...sing it again."
Or the run around the table at meal time or the "We are having THAT for dinner?? BOO-Hooo"

Let's just say that I really love those two, but I need the patience of a saint to keep what little sanity I have left. Today was better, but I think that I am just being optimistic about this being a phase and not the new norm.

Tomorrow will be nice too if anyone has any new Knock, knock jokes suggestions???
Please?
JMB

Berry happy news!!!

I am so excited about the blog celebration, but FIRST...

I am the Auntie of the most BEAUTIFUL little girl. She looks just like a little elfin rosebud...if a person could look like that. She arrived on May 28th and her momma worked really hard to get that girl born. WOW, what a beautiful family. I have never seen my brother look so happy, so shiny! What a great discovery it is to find out that what you were waiting to be when you "grew-up" was a Daddy (or in my case a Mommy). I am only sad because they live all the way on the other coast, in Joi-sey. (I am sure that she will grow up with the cutest accent.) Hooray for babies and continuing life!

I found a sweet number picker at mathgoodies.com...isn't that name rich? And the BIG OL' winner is LEAH!!!! I am so excited and the jmbmommy lovin' is going across the big water to Aussie land! I loved reading who everyone wanted to meet. One of my favorites was Dot...who wanted to meet Steven Tyler. That intrigues me...he would be interesting to meet. He has really lived an unreal life, but in some interviews he seems so normal. I would hope that he would wear leather pants... I mean, it is a signature item.

I would like to thank everyone for posting...blogging is a fun way for me to make the "big" world a bit smaller and friendly. Posting really pushes me to explore my creative interests instead of just thinking about it all the time. I am inspired by the things I read and see on all of your blogs. It is nice to have a global creative community! Thanks for being part of my world!
JMB

--Hey Leah, send me an email with your address info and I will send your goodies ASAP!

Revelations, of the quilting sort...

Things that I have been realizing about myself and/or quilting whilst making this baby quilt:

1) I like to just get started... i.e. get to the cuttin' and the piecing of the smaller parts of the quilt first.

1.5) I need to make a better picture...like with size of the blocks (perhaps?!!) that way my mommy-adled brain doesn't have to keep figuring it out

2) I like the whole process of the wonky quilt making better, as it is more conducive to my LOVE of stopping and starting (having a zillion WIPs)...these more regimented ones are just not as pleasurable as I once thought. I think matching all the seams REALLY gets me in to the whole O.C.D. aspect of my personality.

3)Some times a different venue for sewing is in order for progress to occur. Today, I moved out to the dining room table so that my son and I could work on our projects together. He with his "biggest sticker book ever" and me with my extra pieces (there were supposed to be 12 of the big rectangles and I only made 10...and then I ran out of the right size of hot pink for the 1/2 square triangles...the minutiae is too dull to even share.) (snooze) OK...does any one else get SO tired of making the same blasted block...OVER and OVER?? Has my attention span just gotten really small? (this quilt is not that big, but I am a big whiner.) BUT all that said, it was WAY easier to finish the extra blocks and then sew it all together, out among the chaos than in my sewing room. The chipper banter about friendly aliens probably helped ease my way.

4)I also am not so hot on the sewing the rows together...too many seams to match. I like doing smaller squares in to larger squares in to HUGE squares until I am done.

5)For myself, right now (it always ebbs and flows, doesn't it?), I like the unexpected nature of old fashioned quilts and improvised quilts. I like when something looks like it was hand-done, maybe something is put in backwards... 6)All that said, I am liking the colors here and the cuteness (I do think that it is cute-pretty, and not ugly-pretty, which has been my taste of late) I am proud of my rockin' seam matching, my crisp corners, and the matchy-matchy colors. I only hope that I don't get too crazy and start quilting chemical formulas in to the stars, just to weird it up. I think that the little girl that is going to receive this will like it too. (I am going to be an Auntie!!!)

I have some of the fabric still left over and all those weird little 1/2 square triangles that I saved...maybe I can make myself some thing off-kilter with these colors to satisfy my ugly-pretty desires...maybe!

Funny thing from dinner last night:

Eldest son: I think that I just have a case of the gillies, Momma! (chuckle, wheeze, spit food on the table)

Me: What did you just say?

Him: The GILLIES, you know like when fisch (he has a lisp, bless him!) get the sillies... (then he can't control himself because he is loving how funny his little self is)

Me: (HA HA HA) I sure like the way your brain works!

The Gillies!

JMB