This week has passed in a blur. It is the last week of school for us before the BIG VACAY!! Big Daddy has been traveling an ridiculous amount---- and
--- Yup, that was me taking a sigh break. I can't believe it, but yesterday in the hallway AT school, I said to a few other moms that I didn't really care for the new therapist I have been seeing. BUT, I think that I am going to keep seeing her, BECAUSE it forces me to find help for my kids and be "not mom" for ONE WHOLE HOUR A WEEK! We all laughed. They did, because it was AWKWARD (and a bit identifiable) and me because, once again the old MOUTH was moving light years faster than my SOCIAL filters. The rest of the afternoon was just a free-for-all because Big Daddy was FINALLY coming home and I was pondering what I had realized...
Having my youngest turning 2 has been kind of an underground weirdness... at this point with the boys I was already planning my next pregnancy. There aren't going to be any more, so the paradigm shifts and I am floating out here in uncharted waters. I am seeing that there is going to be a day (sooner than I think) that I am going to be "not mom" for hours at a time. What is that going to mean for me? Do I really think that I am going to fill that time cleaning and doing housework?!! What is the next phase? I think THAT is the fetus I am gestating now... (I just wanted to write fetus)
Frida--- I have been thinking a lot about Frida these days. The colors she used, the dark and light aspects of her art, the intimacy of her self portraits-- I just want to know more. Is there anything that you just want to know more of? Curiosity is a comfort.
So-- I bet you all have been sleeping restlessly, tossing and turning, wondering WHO won the STITCH Gifts 2011 magazine. The random number generator picked #4 and that was a lovely lady named Hilda. We have been in touch and it is winging its way to her house. I was so surprised to see all the new people who commented. It was like THIS year there are an entire DIFFERENT 9 people reading this blog. You poor people, it has been a rather rough year. I am really sooooo much different when the whole Cancer-thing is not a part of everyday life. It has been nice to have a place to put some of those feelings, a safe place, with nice people. Isn't that all any of us want?
I may be back this week with something lighter... I did find a AWESOME silver tinsel tree for $3 and it has been cheering me up as the Willamette Valley has moved in to the damp freeze zone.