Friday, February 20, 2009

Unfortunately, Jessica...


Today I was reading this and it was so funny that I had to try for myself...the results are as follows: ( I just googled "Unfortunately, Jessica" but you should do your own name)

Unfortunately, Jessica was taken by a nasty chest infection, very unusual for Jess, and was unable to perform on the first night.

Unfortunately, Jessica and Sydney are both very well-endowed.

Unfortunately, Jessica's action figure was one of several from the Droids and Ewoks line that was never released to distributors.

Unfortunately, Jessica was the first to be voted off the island, to her total shock and disbelief.

Unfortunately, Jessica's beach volleyball career was cut short due to a back injury.

Unfortunately, Jessica was unable to resist the sexy power of Seductryanyca's Diamond Claw, and she died.

Unfortunately, Jessica had just gotten into that car less than 10 minutes before the accident happened.

Unfortunately, Jessica has left us thinking that she is just another "blonde bimbo".

Unfortunately, Jessica became ill due to the uranium deposits in the mountain, and her father was unable to treat her.

Unfortunately, Jessica's time is running out. She must try and reach the Halloween Ball.

Unfortunately, Jessica's family would not allow the relationship to continue, due to her royal status.

*Unfortunately, Jessica is cursed with a tendency towards major faux pas.

Unfortunately Jessica had an accident with the skate blade to her face.

*Unfortunately, Jessica did not know what that was, but tried unsuccessfully to find it.

*Unfortunately, Jessica does not lack any in the brains department and easily outwitted him, despite his telepathic abilities.

Unfortunately, Jessica's motherhood glow and smiles are already gone, and it's back to the pouty frowny face.

Well, well, that was a hoot... you should try it out too (leave me a message, I want to read yours!)
JMB
PS
I tried to omit the ones directly related to Jessica Simpson, Jessica Biel, or Jessica Alba...they were just too easy.  And man I am so bummed about the action figure, I also starred the ones that could be true!

7 comments:

Lazy Gal Tonya said...

but which action figure were you - Droid or Ewo? eek, starting out sentences with Unfortunately really blows. I wouldn't have thought so many people were writing novels online, but that's the only way I can explain some of these.

alobsiger said...

Heehee! What a hoot! Thanks for a morning laugh!

CT said...

lol! that was too funy! I was shocked to find some references to my name, but none of them were particularily funny as the words were often sentences appart... thanks for the laugh though! :D

Diane said...

I tried this "fun" activity with very dire results. It only got me more depressed about my 53rd birthday (one "unfortunate Diane" it seems, had been ill and died at 51). There was only one mildly amusing phrase: "unfortunately, Diane's Kentucky Butt pants are still around."

Sarah C said...

how fun!

Unfortunately, Sarah got so much water in her boat while upside down that she tipped over on an easy rapid. No harm done, though!

some of the results are so interesting I had to follow the link to see what the story was about.

this is a dangerous use of time! i must stop soon

Sharon said...

Thanks for the laugh! I had to try too:
Unfortunately, Sharon finds herself dealing with mysterious mishaps caused by her braces.
Too funny!

Yaz and Rob said...

So smart, so sassy, you sound like an action hero from the "Real World of Moms and life in General".