But then I went through my pictures and seeing the fall leaves and my sweet oldest son pick me a bouquet of dandelions... well, it almost makes it OK. It almost makes it OK that I was sad and uncomfortable and that most likely no one can really understand it but me. It almost makes my fake smile OK, because his was so real. His was so full, and he was so overflowing with genuine love when he said to me in his gentle small voice,
"Here are some flowers for your birthday Mom."
Then he picked me flowers as we walked down the path, handing them each gently and with a sweet smile. He was just happy to be with me and happy that he could give me something to make me smile.
That makes everything else seem so pale and inconsequential.
Truly it does.
Take pictures, even if you feel silly, or it doesn't seem right at the time. I think later, when you look at them again, maybe you can see them with fresh eyes. Maybe remember a something that did not seem significant at the time, but in retrospect was the best thing that happened all day.
Love your kids, love your family.